Dear Sofia,
Happy Birthday! You’re three years old!
You’ve been so excited about your birthday – for more than a month now! You’re old enough now to understand the concept of holidays and special days. You told us what kind of birthday party you wanted (Sagwa, the Chinese Siamese Cat), what you want to eat (pizza!) and who you wanted to come to your party.
It’s gone something like this:
Me: What’s going to happen on your birthday?
- You: I’m going to get presents!
And what else?
- Play with my friends!
What are you going to eat?
- Cake!
And what are you going to sing?
- singing: Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday Sofia, happy birthday to you!
It’s an exception that proves the rule. Yes, it’s a special day that comes around only once a year, and you’ve been to other birthday parties and understand what the fuss is all about, but the way you’ve been about your birthday shows so much about who you’ve become and what you’re like. You’ve become more aware of your surroundings and more adept at telling us what you think, how you feel, what you want (and don’t want).
A year ago you were just using phrases and short sentences. But now, you’re carrying on real conversations with us now. And do we ever love talking to you!
“I’m Sofia! I’m a big girl!” you announced in the car. “I’m almost all growed up,” you said putting on your own clothes. “Daddy, someday can you and me and mama go bowling again?” you asked. “You’re my best friend,” you’ve told us both. You pick out your clothes for school and order your own food at the Friendly. You tell us what books you want to read, what toys you want to play with and what you don’t want to eat at dinner (practically everything, and no that doesn’t make us all kinds of happy but we know you’re both pushing for limits and staking out your independence at the same time, and we’ll live through it – and I hope by the time you’ve read this you’ve learned to like carrots. Please? But I digress).
And oh yes – this year you learned to use the potty by yourself. We were so proud.
And are you smart! You can recite entire pages – nearly entire books – of Dr. Seuss. You’re learning letters and what words they start (“S is for me!” you say, knowing your name begins with that letter) and building 12-piece puzzles on your own. I love coloring and drawing with you and playing pretend games, hiding in our “clubhouse” from the colorful, fuzzy “monsters” you invent – all of them, somewhat suspiciously, with the name FlopsyMopsyCottontale, and watching you dance. Mommy loves to paint or cut out paper shapes or decorate Easter eggs or make things with Play-Doh with you.
But I love quiet time with you, too. Sometimes you’re difficult to put to bed because you have such an exacting routine and you want to hold the book and turn the pages … man, you’re a handful sometimes, and when I’m done trying to reason with you or explain we’re doing things a certain way and that’s final, I have to remind myself “oh yeah, she’s 3 and she’s tired, this is supposed to happen.” But I love reading to you and seeing how engaged you get with your books. Sometimes we just look at each other and share that special Daddy-Sofia moment – the kind where I can’t help but smile at you, And when you’re really tired, sometimes you still fall asleep on my shoulder or next to me in the easy chair in the living room, and I don’t want to get up or bring you upstairs because I love how you rest on me, warm and snuggly and button-cute, like the little girl you were not so very long ago.
That little girl from a year ago is already growing up – and she had grown up so much, too from one-year-old you. I look at the pictures now, and how you have changed .. so very grown up, such a pretty little girl. It’s amazing to me, when I think about it, that just three years ago your mom and I were camped out at South Shore Hospital, waiting for you to be born, and then were completely overwhelmed with joy by the miracle that is you, in all your pudgy, head-full-of-hair glory. And now here you are, three short years later, a smart, sweet, talented and beautiful person we’re so, so very proud of. We’ve seen the way you interact with your friends at daycare, with strangers we meet, with our friends, and we’re so proud at how polite and charming and just plain good you are.
Where has the time gone? You’re growing so fast … we love the way you’ve grown and how big you are, but we hope you’ll slow down enough to enjoy being 3 – that you’ll be a little girl for a while. Maybe that’s kind of selfish, since you want to be so big .. but there will be time enough for the stress of this world. Be happy and play. At least so we can play with you and share that happy time, too.
“She was this small!” we say, holding our hands about 21 inches apart – that’s how long you were. It doesn’t seem possible. And we look around at our world, and what children and young adults are confronted with now, and it makes us a little nervous that you’re coming of age in such uncertain times. But we have such hope.
Happy birthday, Sofia, and so many, many more…
Love always and forever,
daddy
